Today is 1st December
Its mine and your's birthday month
I keep thinking will you text me or call me on that day
And i keep thinking do i need to wish you happy birthday on your birthday
I have much to do and think about
 
DECEMBER ♥ : New month. New start. New age :)

I tell myself need to give up on you already
There's no use keep me suffering all the time
It won't change anything because you have given up on me already 

I wrote a facebook status that day saying  :

"Now i won't so stupid wait for you anymore, i'll move on. Thanks that you taught me a lesson :) "

I will live my new life in this new month, Thanks to you

You taught me an important lesson that

"When we get hurt, we should be stronger not weaker" 

Thanks Koan Banana, I will remember you as my friend

 

Monday afternoon you called me
I was so happy, but the happiness did not last long
It was just a very short conversation then you had to go
It was hard for me to accept the reality 
The reality that you had to go, The reality that you love her that much

Now i finally understand, Thanks for letting me know
So that i won't bother you again, So that i won't like a piece of shit again waiting for you're text
Yesterday morning (22/11/11) you called her, but not me, I got what you mean
Then in the afternoon, you called her again but not me, I got it

You purposely change to postpaid so that you can call her often, I got it
You never called or text since that day (21/11/11), I got it
You told me that texting with me would be expensive, I got it
I completely 100% got it. Thanks Koan Banana

It mean much to me, Thanks for letting me know everything
Yesterday, when i've almost arrived at Sandakan
I cried while i was singing to myself

I said why do i need to get back to this sad place
Why does everything turns out the same
Why every guys goes to her !!~~
Maybe God tells me, she deserves it more than me
She's more suitable to all of them

Yesterday, when i've reach here i'm in no mood till now
Why do you do so much to one me?
This is too much than i can handle, its hard for me to handle
I'm not educated in this, I'm not professional in this

Then what do i do? What should i do
I can't share it with anyone else unless she gain the same thing as me
If not i can't share much of it
Just can keep it to myself, hide everything that i have to hide
Keep quite and Put on a fake smile

Then everyone won't realise
If everyone won't realise, my secret won't burst out

Tomorrow. Me, Angelina, Esther, Pheobe and Vanessa are finally going to KK
I'm very excited, TEEHEE ! :D
I have a lot of things I wanna share with Pheobe but she had offline

Koan you make me worry, you make me sad
Last night you just text a 'Goodnight :-)' to me thats all
Sad you know? You never told me the reason why?
What about me? No need to think bout my feelings already?


Can you teach me how? Tell me what i should do now?
I really headache. Heart have not nice feeling
You're not perfect but you're all i want


Everyday i need to punch and talk to objects to release everything
Release stress, I hope it didn't turn out this way
Now you're working, I'm at home playing computer
U told me you were busy, but really got that busy?
Or you too busy texting with other girl?
I don't know what you're mind is thinking, I'm not you !


Maybe from the start, We are person from two different world
I should not fall for you, Sorry :')

But i just want to say
U're in my heart is one of a kind
No one can replace you
U make me miss you so badly Koan


Hope to get some news from you tonight.
If you don't wanna find me then its okay

Boy, you've letting me down. I'm so disappointed at you
What do you want me do now? I'm gonna go completely out of mind !
You've made a stupid mistake, But i don't wanna lose you
Do you understand me?

My heart keeps breaking every single day
You said you care me, but did you really show?
You said you don't wanna hurt me, but did you do it?
It keeps get out of hand

Anyone may hurt someone they love, Hearts may break
Yes, I know ! But you've made a stupid mistake
You're such a fool !

Yesterday, you didn't text me. Okay, fine ! I wait
But today you did the same thing
Its either you don't wanna text me, forgot to text me or others
There's a lot of reasons for you to NOT TEXT ME

Goodbye, Koan Banana :'( 

Just a few more days until my friends and i are going to KK
So excited ! Chel Yie cannot go, Too Bad !
I always use this so play her, she so angry


Okay, back to my life
Well . . . I really don't understand you !
Is it texting me, got schedule?
Weekdays text me, Weekends no text me
Hey ! Damn make me feel like a piece of shit ! 
AGAIN . . .


Monday (14/11/11)
This morning you texted me
What the heck ! I really don't know how to say you 
But anyways still reply you 
I so easy heart soft, Stubborn Me !


When you texted me, i sneezed !
Laugh Out Loud ! I quite lazy to reply you already
I really don't know what you want
I am not vending machine, not when you'll want it just press a button you'll have it


I am a Girl, Heart-Broken Girl, Normal Girl
Every week you'd break my heart once
One month you'd break my heart four times
I am so stubborn that I Love You !

Today is a special day : (11/11/11)


Its the last day of school for 2011 which is also for Form 2
This year is a meaningful year cause' i've done much more than last year
This year i have many friends to spend it together with me
And i'm greatful for that


This year i've also been more active in curiculum except for Ping Pong
Cause' i am lame at Ping Pong
Hey, i didn't choose to go in
Don't know who and who put me inside


This morning i text with you
Very happy indeed 
But when noon stricks, you went on with your work 
Didn't even find me till night
Okay then. Fine !


This afternoon went to The Boss
With some of my classmates for Prescila's farewell
Cause' she is not gonna be with us at Sandakan any longer
Sad huh?


Well, it wasn't quite the farewell i expected
Just like normal going out with friends
Nothing special
That Pheobe and Chel Yie put Me and Angelina airplane 
Mad but it was very fun also even without them


We talked alot, Got to know more bout each other
I can say it was A Great Day
I ♥ Angelina Wong Ci Huey
Hey, i am not lesbian 

Hope tomorrow i will have something to write bout

If not i'll be quite boring before noon

Really hope that you'll text me soon

If not, please never find me again !

Today i don't know that i will be so brave 
This morning i can't resist, i text you 
I scold everything that i wanted to scold

Wow. A good start
Then everything start to be sad, sorry and everything
I just hate it when every guy is like that
You are, He were

Argh! But i felt much better when i got the braveness to text you
I spill everything out but it was not good then wipe it away
And i'm okay 




My current AIM is :

• Not to believe in guys anymore (literally) 
• Move on with my own life without anyone buggin' in
• Don't get hurt, cry or moody for anyone who don't deserves it
• Focus on closest friends, studies and activies
• Build my heart stronger and stronger each and every single day to face the future

Believe in yourself that you can do it :)

Today is a day that you didn't find me
Well, i'm okay with it and i should be
Your not my who

I tell myself that i didn't like you 
I'm very sure that i like you
I only treated you as a friend, A good and caring friend

Today (Saturday 5/11/11) :
You didn't text me the whole day, Well not really whole day yet
But i don't know why i'm waiting so bad for your text
Hey ! Can you give me a reason why?
So that i will not so worry?

If you busy can you at least tell me?
If you don't wanna text me can you inform me?
I won't bother you anymore, I won't bother you anymore !

Everytime this will happen . .